In a dazzling display of event scheduling prowess, the Chicago Red Stars find themselves ousted from their home turf at SeatGeek Stadium on September 21 to make way for Riot Fest. Yes, you heard that right—a music festival has the women’s professional soccer team scrambling to find an alternate venue for their match against the San Diego Wave. One might say the solution involves a bit of musical chairs, but with higher stakes and less fun.

Riot Fest, the well-known rock and punk festival, has relocated from Douglass Park in Chicago to SeatGeek Stadium in Bridgeview, Illinois. In doing so, they’ve essentially told the Chicago Red Stars, “Sorry, finders keepers,” leaving the soccer team to figure out an alternative. This intriguing twist of fate might make one wonder if there’s an underlying rock anthem better suited for strategy meetings at the Red Stars' offices than the usual inspirational sports mantra.

SeatGeek Stadium, which is indeed the home base of the Red Stars, suddenly finds itself repurposed for guitar riffs and mosh pits instead of dribbles and goal celebrations. Naturally, this hasn’t sat well with the Red Stars President, Karen Leetzow, who expressed concerns about the treatment discrepancies between women's and men's professional sports. To paraphrase, it's hard not to feel like a second-class citizen when your home is taken over by rock stars, or, in this case, by people pretending to be them.

"While we are immensely supportive of the arts and live music, this situation just isn’t ideal for us,” Leetzow could have said, probably. With less than a month to prepare, the Red Stars’ leadership is working diligently to find a new venue that ensures a "first-rate experience" for players and fans. This involves more than just a few frantic Google searches for empty fields; alternate venues like Soldier Field and Guaranteed Rate Field have been tossed into the ring, though not all are particularly attractive or convenient choices.

Add to the mix Laura Ricketts, the new majority owner of the Red Stars and co-owner of the Chicago Cubs, whose sports empire seems to have a theme of record-setting: a recent Red Stars match at Wrigley Field set a new NWSL attendance record with 35,038 fans. Ricketts doesn’t believe SeatGeek Stadium is suitable for the team’s long-term needs—an assessment that appears increasingly prescient given the current chaos.

To compound the headache, SeatGeek Stadium is notoriously inconvenient for fans residing on the north side of Chicago and in the northern suburbs. Imagine making that trek only to find the venue transformed into a haven for music lovers instead of soccer enthusiasts! Would they send in the clowns, or should we stick to sending in the rock bands?

And if the plot wasn’t thick enough, the Red Stars might even pursue legal action over the conflicting schedules. Perhaps they intend to throw the book—likely a legal manual at this point—at the decision to prioritize Riot Fest. However, with the team currently holding a 5-6-1 record and sixth place in the 14-team NWSL, maintaining focus on the field might be more challenging than ever.

In the grand scheme of things, the Riot Fest uproar could lead to a revitalized conversation about the treatment and prioritization of women's sports. As Leetzow subtly underscored, if the Chicago Bears were displaced to make room for a fishing tournament, the reaction might not just be uproarious but possibly world-ending.

For now, we eagerly await the next move in this game of venue musical chairs. Will the Red Stars find a pitch to call home temporarily or will they inspire a grassroots soccer-tourism economy by moving to yet another neighborhood? One thing’s for certain: Chicago sports fans are in for a wild ride, with or without the punk rock soundtrack.

In the words of practically everyone who has ever been evicted: here's hoping for a swift solution and hopefully, less head-banging - of the literal and metaphorical kind.