Get ready to watch four brave souls attempt the first commercial spacewalk—and find out if human adaptation to the vacuum of space takes a little more than just a good suit—during the Polaris Dawn mission.

Launching from NASA’s Kennedy Space Center, the Polaris Dawn mission will send astronauts Jared Isaacman, Anna Menon, Sarah Gillis, and Scott Poteet soaring to an altitude surpassing 870 miles, making it the highest crewed mission since Apollo. As they embark on this audacious journey into Earth's radiation belts, the crew will not only aim to break altitude records but also venture into the unknown of a spacewalk without an airlock, armed with snazzy new spacesuits and a questionable amount of common sense.

The Polaris Dawn mission is forging ahead in a way that would make even the most daring astronauts raise an eyebrow. Set to launch into the great beyond, this expedition stands to surpass the esteemed record established during NASA's Gemini 11 mission in 1966. Yes, dear readers, it’s about to get very interesting up there, as this crew trades the comfort of Earth for a test of human resilience at dizzying heights—870 miles to be exact. That’s roughly equivalent to a highway trip of three million burgers stacked one on top of the other. Probably, anyway. No astrophysicist has taken the time to verify this analogy, but it feels right, doesn't it?

The crew on board, composed of Jared Isaacman, who’s no stranger to space travel after his debut in the Inspiration4 mission, mission pilot Scott Poteet, and specialists Anna Menon and Sarah Gillis, will embark on a journey not just of physical heights but also of scientific inquiry. These four are collectively taking on the responsibility of not only exploring space but also conducting approximately 40 science experiments aiming to decipher how humans adapt to life with a 0% chance of getting coffee from the break room. This, mind you, follows a rigorous training regimen designed to prepare them for the psychological hurdles of floating in nothingness—those Netflix binges in zero gravity aren't going to watch themselves.

The Polaris Dawn mission's main spotlight will be a historic spacewalk: one executed without an airlock. This bold maneuver raises a tantalizing question—will the astronauts become truly one with the vacuum of space, or will they end up wishing they'd added 'petty emotional grievances' to their training program? SpaceX has thoughtfully equipped these troopers with newly developed Extravehicular Activity suits, which feature advancements like thermal insulation and helmet cameras. Because nothing screams ‘comfy’ like a suit that can withstand extreme temperatures while supplying a live feed of your impending existential crisis.

With their groundbreaking technology, astronauts will navgate through the perilous vacuum that awaits outside their spacecraft. There's no airlock to take refuge in, which means every second in the void will require not only guts but a dash of humor to survive the absurdity of it all. 'We hope to collect valuable insights into how our bodies handle space conditions,' stated Jared Isaacman, clearly understating the sheer amount of human ingenuity buzzing behind this venture. You have to wonder if they’re bringing back souvenirs from the vacuum, perhaps a light and airy void of space to remind them of their journey.

The mission has built a bridge between the heroic achievements of past astronauts and the audacious possibilities of commercial space travel. Since no human has ventured this far since Apollo, there’s a bit of pressure wrapped around breaking records. True, it was only around 57 years ago when this feat was last accomplished, but at least neither having to wait for your flight nor worrying about the line at Starbucks is an issue for this flight. It’s all about making history, breaking new records, and perhaps, barring any scientific miscalculations, discovering if a spacewalk without the assistance of airlocks can actually take flight—or become a somewhat comical calamity.

Each flight attendant might have their own unique flavor of chaos when things get unpredictable, but such risks are present in this new era of space exploration, and Polaris Dawn is adamant about pushing boundaries. At a time when we can summon a pizza with the tap of a smartphone, why not evolve from all-civilian space flights to conducting the first commercial spacewalk? It's all just part and parcel of humanity's quest to find... whatever it is we’re searching for in the cosmos, or maybe just wanting to avoid waiting in lines on Earth.

As Polaris Dawn prepares for launch, the atmosphere is thick with a mix of excitement and just a hint of anxiety—much like the day before final exams. These astronauts are gearing up not just to redefine the limits of human exploration in tangible terms. They’re also taking on the lighter side of the human experience: making history while laughing off the nerves induced by the unpredictability of space and the occasional antic of being surrounded by three other crew members at zero gravity. Truly a test of character in ways that the high school social worker would have never anticipated.

As their mission unfolds, we can expect to witness human ambition at work, unbound by traditional limitations or the rational desire to stay closer to home. The Polaris Dawn mission isn’t just about physically ascending heights; it’s a rather remarkable commentary on our constant exploration for the thrill—or folly—of what lies beyond. So, as the countdown begins, let's hold our breath (figuratively, of course) and watch as this brave quartet embarks on a surreal joyride through the cosmos.