A 15-by-15-foot sinkhole has derailed traffic on Interstate 80 in New Jersey, prompting Governor Murphy to declare a state of emergency as the roadway’s issues are compared to a slice of Swiss cheese.

The newly-formed sinkhole, which appeared in a construction zone, has forced a complete detour of all traffic on I-80, making rush hour feel like the world’s longest cheese slice. With eastbound lanes already closed for repairs on previous sinkholes, the New Jersey Department of Transportation estimates that fixing this latest hole will take several weeks, leaving commuters to chew on the irony of a road that just can't seem to stay whole.

The 15-by-15-foot dilemma began unexpectedly, just as many good stories do. According to the NJ DOT, the sinkhole opened up right amidst ongoing construction efforts—because, apparently, those projects weren't already ambitious enough without uninvited geological phenomena.

Eastbound traffic on I-80 has been fighting its own battles for months, with lanes closed for repairs after a series of previous sinkholes. Locals and commuters alike might now be questioning whether New Jersey's roads are a test run for some sort of sinkhole-themed amusement park ride.

Westbound lanes are now feeling the effects of the newly formed crater, being detoured at Exit 34 to Route 15 northbound. Drivers, who initially thought they were simply navigating an ordinary stretch of highway, may feel as if they've accidentally been cast as extras in a real-life game of 'choose-your-own-adventure.'

Wharton Mayor William Chegwidden provided some context, framing the sinkhole saga as not just a local inconvenience but a shared headache at both the federal and state levels. 'It's like a volcanic eruption, but with asphalt,' he likely didn't say, but it surely encapsulates the tympanic rumbling of frustrations among local officials trying to manage the aftermath.

New Jersey's infrastructure issues have not gone unnoticed, as the sinkholes have raised eyebrows and lowered expectations regarding highway longevity. Officials described the structural problems akin to Swiss cheese, which seems a bit unfair to Swiss cheese, given that at least it’s tasty.

Still, drivers are likely left pondering whether Interstate 80 is a road, or simply an inconvenience masquerading as one.

With heavy traffic backed up for miles, motorists caught in the jam are probably eating their lunch in their cars as the minutes stretch into hours, hoping that GPS isn't trying to break any records for traffic rerouting. Meanwhile, repair crews are bracing for repairs that could last at least several weeks.

In the spirit of cooperative erosion, it seems that both residents and commuters are stuck in this proverbial hole together, perhaps bonding over shared grievances and the distinct smell of asphalt. To those who may find comfort in solidarity, remember: misery loves company and a freshly brewed cup of coffee, or, in this case, a roadside Diner Burger.

As the state of emergency persists, New Jerseyans may soon be seeking out alternative routes, although anything could inspire such creativity. Perhaps, like an unintentional art installation, the sinkhole could encourage locals to embrace the imperfections of life—or simply question their life choices when commuting becomes synonymous with adventure.

Ultimately, the saga of the Interstate 80 sinkhole serves as a reminder that while New Jersey has its fair share of structural challenges, at least it provides tales that could last longer than the repairs. May the asphalt gods have mercy on us all as we navigate this cheese-like predicament.