In a plot twist straight out of a daytime soap opera—or perhaps just an overly exciting financial crime textbook—Ippei Mizuhara, Shohei Ohtani's former interpreter, recently pleaded guilty to federal charges of bank fraud and tax fraud. So, if you thought being a famous baseball player's interpreter was just about translating, think again. It turns out there are other, more devious "multi-lingual" activities involved.

You see, it wasn't just about translating home run interviews. Mizuhara apparently also excelled in translating $17 million from Ohtani’s bank account to pay off his gambling debts. That's right, nearly $17 million was stealthily shifted under the guise of necessary financial transactions. Makes you wonder if Mizuhara’s interpretation skills included being an expert at fraud.

According to sources, Mizuhara didn't just dabble; he was a prolific gambler, making a whopping 19,000 wagers between December 2021 and January 2024. That kind of betting behavior puts even Las Vegas regulars to shame. Despite all those wagers, though, his knack for picking winners was apparently less impressive. Mizuhara’s gambling escapades resulted in gross winnings of over $142 million, which sounds impressive until you realize he had net losses of approximately $41 million. Guess he should have stuck to translation instead.

Mizuhara’s fraudulent activities didn’t stop at simply misappropriating funds. He also impersonated Ohtani. Yes, you read that right. Mizuhara used Ohtani’s passwords and sweet-talked bankers into transferring hefty sums of money. One can only imagine what that pitch sounded like: “This is Shohei Ohtani. Trust me, I need that transfer. Oh, and by the way, you’re great at your job.”

Unfortunately for Mizuhara, no amount of sweet-talking or impersonation could save him from the long arm of the law. He’s slated to be sentenced on October 25, 2024, and the legal system doesn't exactly hand out participation trophies. In the meantime, he's been ordered to pay restitution, including around $17 million back to Ohtani and over $1 million to the IRS. Bet he wishes he could interpret his way out of this one.

For those concerned about Ohtani’s role in all this, fear not. The baseball star has been cleared of any wrongdoing and is considered a victim in this peculiar real-life drama. In this tragicomedy, Ohtani was simply the unsuspecting athlete with a treacherous interpreter. Sort of like a Shakespearean play, but with less poetic dialogue and more federal charges.

If you're wondering why someone would risk it all, it boils down to Mizuhara’s uncontrollable gambling habits. Despite raking in colossal amounts of money, his net losses reveal a tragic overestimation of his luck. After all, translating betting slips into cash didn’t work out quite as well as translating interviews.

In the end, Mizuhara’s gamble didn’t pay off. His desperate attempts to cover enormous gambling debts have essentially rewritten his role from “trusted interpreter” to “criminal mastermind”. It’s a tale that comes with its own moral: if you’re going to translate, stick to languages, not bank accounts. Unfortunately for Mizuhara, Google Translate won't be able to interpret a get-out-of-jail-free card for him.

For Shohei Ohtani, the road ahead means focusing on his career without the shadow of fraudulent interpreters. It's safe to say he'll be much more cautious about who manages his accounts from now on. As for Mizuhara, his sentencing will likely mark the end of an illustrious yet criminal chapter. So, until October 2024, we can reflect on this modern-day parable of trust and betrayal.

It's too bad Mizuhara didn't bet on the one sure thing—honesty.