Charleston, South Carolina witnessed a hefty game of bumper cars on Wednesday afternoon, except this time, the players weren't small children in electric cars but a hulking 997-foot-long container ship and a major bridge. The US Coast Guard is currently investigating the incident, likely to figure out why a vessel that size thought it was a good idea to go rogue in the Charleston Harbor.

The uninvited excitement began when the MSC Michigan 7, a vessel registered in Liberia and operated by Mediterranean Shipping Company, somehow lost control shortly after leaving port. Apparently not content with a leisurely cruise, the ship’s engines cranked up to nearly full throttle, reaching speeds between 14 to 17 knots. For context, that's roughly how fast a downhill skier moves – while completely out of control.

As the ship barreled ahead, the Ravenel Bridge was shut down in all directions as a precaution. After all, no one wants to recreate the "bridge too far" scenario. The bridge closure, while a temporary inconvenience for Charleston commuters, was a minor detail compared to the aquatic chaos unfolding below.

The ship's wake managed to push two recreational boaters onto rocks, resulting in non-life-threatening injuries. The boaters are now likely reconsidering their life choices and the wisdom of sailing anywhere near large, out-of-control vessels. Minor damage was also reported along the vessel’s merry route, but those details may have been lost in the overall spectacle.

While the idea of a nearly 74,000-gross-ton vessel playing chicken with a bridge might sound like a scene from a Michael Bay movie, the crew eventually regained control and anchored the vessel about 8.5 nautical miles offshore. Nevertheless, the Ravenel Bridge reopened once the aquatic mammoth passed safely underneath. No "Ten Things I Hate About You" bridge-taming moments here, just a sigh of relief.

This incident couldn’t help but trigger memories of another massive marine misadventure. Just over two months ago, a 213-million-pound cargo vessel leaving the Port of Baltimore decided to slam into the Francis Scott Key Bridge. That tragic incident ended with six construction workers losing their lives, a grim reminder that container ships clearly have boundary issues that need addressing.

However, in Charleston, onlookers and those impacted by the bridge closure can perhaps take mild comfort in one fact: all's well that ends with an enormous vessel anchored safely offshore. That said, it would be wise for ports everywhere to double-check their ship control mechanisms. After all, no one wants to see bumper cars on the high seas become a regular sports event.

For the record, next time MSC Michigan 7 or any of its colossal kin want to go for a spin, we'd all appreciate a little more control and a little less dramatics. The bridges, boats, and egos of recreational sailors in Charleston thank you in advance.