Polaris Dawn Astronauts Attempt Spacewalk, Forget Keys Inside

Polaris Dawn Astronauts Attempt Spacewalk, Forget Keys Inside

3 minute read
Published: 9/12/2024

In an out-of-this-world adventure, billionaire Jared Isaacman leads the first-ever private spacewalk, proving that not only government astronauts get to float in space—now, rich folks with cool suits do too!

This groundbreaking mission marks the dawn of a new era, as the Polaris Dawn crew takes a historic two-hour stroll outside the SpaceX Dragon capsule, testing advanced technology for future crewed lunar and Martian missions. With Isaacman leading the way, the trip showcases space exploration's latest twist: if you’ve got enough cash, you can now join the elite ranks of astronauts—and maybe even take a selfie while you’re at it.

As the mission commander, Jared Isaacman didn't waste any time proving that being a billionaire entrepreneur comes with perks. He was the first to exit the capsule, becoming an immediate trendsetter in the realm of private spacewalking. While previous spacewalks were always the domain of government astronauts, this time, the universe officially added a new category: Sparkly Wealthy Individuals in Space. Astronauts, don’t be jealous. Just consider it an exclusive club with a hefty membership fee.

The spacewalk commenced with some serious preparations. As the crew geared up to unlatch the hatch of the SpaceX Dragon capsule, it's rumored a full checklist was involved. After all, when you’re millions of miles away from a repair shop, you want to make sure you didn’t forget your space keys (whoops, there goes your practical joke on mission control). In case you're wondering, the crew only brought the essentials: high-tech suits, scientific instruments, and, presumably, a few snacks. Because what's a spacewalk without some cosmic munchies?

Strapped into their SpaceX-designed extravehicular activity (EVA) suits, the team embarked on their two-hour endeavor with enough bravery to inspire the most reluctant couch potato to, perhaps, step outside for some fresh air—on Earth, of course. Their suits, a product of significant investment and technological prowess, were designed not just to keep them safe but also to ensure that they looked exceptionally fashionable while dangling in the void. After all, if you're going to float in zero gravity, you might as well do it with style.

While many of us are grappling with the idea of wearing sweatpants for the eighth consecutive day, these trailblazers were prepping for nearly 40 scientific experiments. The Pokemon Dawn mission, named after the mythical character, is not just about stirring deep-seated nostalgia but also aims to further our understanding of life in microgravity. Scientists back on Earth are already drafting their formal requests to the Polaris team: please don’t bring any Pokémon back, especially if they evolve into legendary creatures that dramatically alter the ecosystem.

This crew comprises some of the first SpaceX employees to venture into space—a groundbreaking move that not only boosts morale in the office but also makes the company culture seem far cooler than ordinary start-ups. Can you imagine the conversations at their next company retreat? 'So, what did you do last weekend? Oh, just a spacewalk to test some fancy tech!' Those casual outings surely put traditional team-building exercises, like trust falls, to shame.

The significance of the Polaris Dawn mission stretches beyond mere bragging rights or exciting social media posts. It's a critical step towards future missions to the Moon and Mars, making this more than just a fashionable stroll in space. As the SpaceX Dragon capsule travels further than any spacecraft has in over five decades, we recognize the groundbreaking nature of this achievement.

Jared Isaacman and his remarkable crew are in uncharted territory, proving that the universe is a canvas for human ambition. The potential for future exploration is immense, as they embark on the first-ever private spacewalk, testing SpaceX technology needed for future crewed missions to the moon and Mars. If you can’t bring back souvenirs, at least bring back a good story.