Marco Rubio has thrown down the gauntlet, declaring the U.S. might just pack its bags and leave the peace talks in favor of a Netflix binge if a deal isn't struck in a matter of days.

As tensions escalate and the clock ticks, Rubio warns that the U.S. is not in the mood for long negotiations about the war in Ukraine. Expressing his exasperation during discussions with Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov and European leaders, he insists that if progress isn't made swiftly, the peace talks might just get the 'cancelled' stamp and reality TV might take the stage instead.

Building on this sentiment, Rubio made it clear that a timeline of weeks or months would not sit well with the current administration. "If there are no clear signs of a deal, we will start to look elsewhere for entertainment that doesn’t involve conflict—perhaps a riveting documentary on the mating habits of sloths," he remarked with a hint of sarcasm, clearly frustrated by the slow pace of negotiations.

The urgency, he pointed out, stems from a strong belief that the U.S. involvement is crucial but in no way a permanent crutch for Ukraine. After three years of support, he noted, it seems increasingly clear that the war is not seen as America's fight. "We’re here to help, not to turn the war into one of our ongoing soap operas," he quipped, adding a touch of levity to the grim situation.

Moreover, Rubio recently engaged in dialogues with both European and Ukrainian leaders, emphasizing a shared desire to end this prolonged conflict. Although his discussions in Paris were met with encouraging responses concerning a U.S. peace framework, the pressure is mounting. "We need to see things moving; otherwise, we might have to start handing out popcorn for the war’s next season, and frankly, I don’t think that’s a hit the public is ready for," he stated, channeling a mix of seriousness and dry humor.

Rubio's frustrations echo throughout the White House, where the lack of progress is no laughing matter. Allegedly, officials are hanging on the edge of their seats, fidgeting nervously while checking their watches, hoping for some sort of breakthrough before they feel compelled to shift gears and focus on more pressing matters—like the return of the pumpkin spice latte.

He conveyed the overwhelming sentiment that the U.S. cannot indefinitely pursue a resolution with little to show for it. During a recent press gathering, Rubio said, "If we don’t determine soon whether ending the war is feasible, we might find ourselves just counting down the minutes until our next international crisis, and no one wants that—except perhaps the scheduling department. They thrive on unpredictability."

In this high-stakes diplomatic chess game, it seems time is of the essence. Rubio's timeline, if he had it his way, would be filled with a rapid reflux of negotiations rather than drawn-out deliberations. Anyone hoping for a leisurely pace might want to reconsider their expectations, particularly in the crease of a ticking clock that Rubio has now put on full display.

After all, the world of diplomacy can often feel like a hurried buffet—you don't have forever to make your choices or your plate will start to look rather empty. In this case, Rubio appears to be keen on refilling the dish with tangible peace indicators or, at the very least, new hors d'oeuvres signifying a hopeful change. If neither happens soon, it might just be time to clear the table and move to the next course—one that doesn't involve endless waiting and vague promises.

Ultimately, the bold position taken by Rubio serves as both a wake-up call and a comedic reminder that even the gravest international crises have a bit of absurdity woven in. Whether this peace framework comes to fruition within the short window Rubio proposes will undoubtedly shape the future of U.S. involvement in global affairs. So, fasten your seat belts, folks; it seems the diplomatic rollercoaster isn’t slowing down anytime soon.