In a spectacle that drew up to 200,000 attendees, Pope Leo XIV kicked off his papacy on May 18, 2025, urging a united Catholic Church to tackle discord and heal the wounds of the world.

In his inaugural mass, Pope Leo XIV not only called for unity within the Catholic Church, but also made a heartfelt plea for global peace, specifically urging an end to violence in Ukraine and prayers for Gaza. With the weight of tradition on his shoulders—as he donned the papal symbols and took a popemobile tour through St. Peter's Square—the new pope emphasized the Church's mission to bridge divides and serve the marginalized, while humorously acknowledging the ever-watchful spirit of his predecessor, Pope Francis.

Pope Leo XIV presided over the mass, which attracted a remarkable array of attendees, including pilgrims, presidents, and princes. All were there to witness history—or perhaps just to argue about the best way to arrange the holy bread. With the crowd estimated between 150,000 and 200,000, it was a congregation large enough to rival some music festivals. At least here, the line to the nearest bathroom was likely shorter than at Coachella.

During his address, Pope Leo made it abundantly clear that unity wouldn't just be a suggestion; it would be an expectation. He spoke with zeal about the need for a church that could serve as a bastion of love and peace amidst a world that often resembles a chaotic game of hot potato involving nuclear codes. To many in attendance, Leo's message felt as refreshing as the last slice of pizza at a gathering, inviting, needed, and a little noble too.

The new pope did not shy away from addressing some pressing matters either. He pointedly remarked on the discord and deep-seated wounds caused by hatred and violence, before quickly pivoting to mention the economic systems that seem intent on treating the poorest as if they're simply unfortunate players in the game of Monopoly. One can only hope this papal rhetoric isn't lost on the boardroom strategists busy subletting spiritual real estate.

In a poignant moment that led to a collective outpouring of 'amens' and head nods, Pope Leo expressed his profound hope for peace in Ukraine—a land in turmoil where people continue to suffer as the world spins like a dreadfully misaligned globe. He also extended his prayers to those caught in the ongoing strife in Gaza, because let's be honest—world peace doesn’t require a PhD, just some goodwill and perhaps a good mediator or two.

As an added touch of irony, Pope Leo donned the pallium and the fisherman's ring during his inaugural service. These symbols were not just ancient fashion accessories, but a reminder of the enduring role of the Church as 'fishers of men.'

One of the more memorable sights of the day was Pope Leo's popemobile tour through St. Peter's Square. Custom-designed for visibility, this particular vehicle allowed Leo to wave serenely to the masses, evoking a paparazzi-like atmosphere more typically reserved for celebrity weddings. With grinning faces staring back at him, a few children even tested the theory of whether waving blanket-like from their parents' shoulders would score them a blessing-worth selfie.

Upon concluding his mass, Pope Leo XIV was greeted by U.S. Vice President JD Vance. However, he was scheduled to meet with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy directly after the Mass, indicating a different context. There are pastimes, after all, for those in the higher echelons of society—from courting public opinion to selecting the best wines for diplomatic dinners. But one might wonder how often vice presidents get the chance to chat theology at the after-party.

Later on, Pope Leo was set to meet with the Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy, a meeting that promises to stir a potent mix of politics and spirituality. One can only hope that the ensuing discussions can perhaps lead toward an outcome that resembles 'just and lasting peace'—as opposed to just the usual back and forth that often characterizes diplomatic dialogues we're accustomed to after binge-watching all our political dramas.

In summation, the installation of Pope Leo XIV reflects a moment that wasn't just characterized by solemnity but resonated with the hopeful cries for essential unity, peace, and love. Those traits are timeless, though it's clear in the context of our chaotic world, they’re more needed than ever. So, perhaps, as the world watches and waits for the Church to step up in challenging times, they can take a page from Leo’s papacy—be open, be earnest, and always keep a keen eye on the humor of life's great mysteries. After all, a united Church is like a huge family reunion; there’s bound to be a few squabbles along the way.